Planning and attending a memorial service can be one of the most emotionally significant experiences of a person's life. Knowing what to expect — and having the right tools to prepare — can make the process feel more manageable and more meaningful.
This guide covers the most common questions about memorial services and walks you through how to plan one well.
What is a memorial service?
A memorial service is a gathering held to honour and remember someone who has passed away. It gives family and friends the opportunity to come together, share memories, and mark the significance of a life. A memorial service focuses on celebrating who the person was — their character, their relationships, and the impact they had on those around them.
What is the difference between a memorial service and a funeral?
Both a funeral and a memorial service are ways of farewelling someone who has died. The key difference is that a funeral typically takes place while the body is present, before burial or cremation. A memorial service is usually held after the cremation or burial has already occurred, which means there is greater flexibility about when and where it takes place. Memorial services can happen days, weeks, or even months after the death — whenever feels right for the family.
What happens at a memorial service?
There are no fixed rules. A memorial service can take almost any form, which is part of what makes it such a personal occasion. Most services include someone sharing stories and memories of the person, music that held meaning for them, and readings or poems that reflect their character or beliefs. Many also include:
A tribute video showing photos and video clips from their life
An opportunity for guests to share their own memories
The scattering of ashes at a meaningful location
Food and drinks shared together after the service
What should I wear to a memorial service?
Dress codes at memorial services are generally less formal than at a traditional funeral. Most people choose neat, semi-formal clothing. The venue and tone of the service will give you the best indication — a service held in a garden or at the beach has different expectations to one held in a chapel. If you're unsure, check with the organisers.
How do I plan a memorial service?
Start with the practical decisions: when and where, and who you'd like to invite. Once the location is confirmed, let people know as soon as possible — by phone, email, or message. Then work through the program: who will speak, what music will play, and what other elements you want to include.
The Memories Order of Service Builder makes it straightforward to design a program booklet for the service — with templates, photo options, and content drawn from what you've already written. It produces a print-ready file without any design experience needed.
Memorial service ideas
Because there are no fixed rules, a memorial service can reflect the person completely. Some families keep it traditional; others do something entirely their own:
A backyard gathering with music they loved
A fundraising event for a cause they cared about
A meal at a restaurant that meant something to them
A gathering at the beach, in a park, or at their favourite place
A themed service that reflects a passion or obsession they had
The best memorial services feel like the person. That's the only rule worth following.
How do I let people know about a memorial service?
The most important information to share is when and where. A phone call for immediate family, followed by a message or email for a wider circle, is the most common approach. For families who want something more considered, a digital invitation via Canva works well — or the details can be shared through the online memory book, which guests can visit both before and after the service.
What is an order of service?
An order of service — sometimes called a memorial service program — is a printed booklet handed to guests as they arrive. It typically includes a photograph of the person, their name and dates, the order of the service, the names of speakers, and any readings or songs being shared. It often becomes a keepsake that people hold onto for years.
The Memories Order of Service Builder lets you create a beautiful, coordinated booklet — and if you've already written an obituary or biography in the platform, that content flows directly into the booklet without needing to be rewritten.
What is an online memorial?
An online memorial is a private, secure digital space where a person's life is preserved in photos, videos, written stories, and messages from family and friends. It sits alongside the service as a lasting home for everything created — the tribute video, the eulogy, the guest book messages — and can be added to over time by the people who loved the person.
The Memories Digital Guest Book is a natural part of this. A QR code displayed at the service lets guests leave a message, a photo, or a short video tribute directly from their phone. People who couldn't attend can contribute via a shared link in the days and weeks that follow. Every message is automatically preserved in the Memories Online Memory Book.
An online memorial is especially valuable for family and friends who cannot attend the service in person. No matter where they are in the world, they can view the tribute video, read the stories, and leave their own memories.
The benefits of creating an online memorial
Everything gathered for the service — photos, videos, the tribute video, written stories, guest book messages — lives together in one private, permanent space
Family and friends anywhere in the world can contribute their own photos and memories
The memorial grows richer over time as new contributions arrive
Future generations can open it and understand who this person was
For families who want something physical to hold, the Memories Hardcover Memory Book Builder transforms everything gathered into a beautifully printed keepsake to keep and pass down
Everything in one place
Memories brings together every tool a family needs for a memorial service — the tribute video builder, the eulogy writer, the obituary writer, the order of service builder, the digital guest book, and the online memory book. Start with what you already have — a handful of photos, a few stories — and Memories guides you through the rest.
Start for free — no credit card required.